I have only been engaged a month, but the planning is in full effect. I worry about the wedding, the move, my dress, our venue, and on and on. There has been so many things that I wish I could share with my fiancé, but he has been focused on the honeymoon. Not that I’m not excited about what he’s found. I just don’t know what I can ask him for and what I want to keep a surprise for him.
Grooms have much different ideas about weddings. There are some that don’t want care about anything but getting their tux. But I can’t figure out, just how much I can ask of him, share with him, or involve him in. It’s not that I don’t want him to be part of the planning, but, I have been hoping and planning for the perfect wedding, all my life. Even if, I didn’t think it would ever happen.
And I’ve watched enough movies or tv shows, to know that the interaction with the groom, as well as, the groom’s involvement, play heavily on your relationship. Honestly, I don’t want him to stress about this, or to be honest, ruin this! And I have shared with him, many of my thoughts and ideas. Which he has been open and accepting of. The only thing that he presented to me and challenged me on, has been, his nephew being the ring bearer. I was not planning on having either a flower girl or ring bearer.
Yet, because of his nephew’s inquisition, on whether or not he could play this position, my fiancé was adamant that he wanted that to happen. I heard him out, could see how it would work and relented. Yet, there was a big part of me that felt this was about his nephew, and not about marrying me.
I’m calling out my fears, he is still thinking more how attached he is to his family than he is to me, his fiancé. I’m not saying that he is trying to give me the wedding of my dreams, but I have had to change my dream wedding to make it work with season we are getting married in. And not sure that he understands I’m trying to make this our dream wedding, and I do want it to be perfect. Well, at least fun for everyone!