The countdown is on, I will be married in less than a year. My man is so happy that I’m going to be his wife. Yet, I’ve got my reserves! I am going to move close to 1,500 miles, to be with my man. And when I ask him what he is giving up for me, he has a hard time answering. What does that mean for our future?
I wanted to know that my future husband is willing to give his everything for me. And I’m not saying that I’m giving everything up for him. Yet, I feel I’m doing more for this relationship than he is. And I don’t know that I’m ready for the answers he was giving me. Because, I felt that our plan, was enough for him. And with that, it was settled that I would be the one who was giving up my life, in order to live with his life.
It makes me think that he doesn’t know me, I’m a person that is welling to search the world. And I’m not going to ever be satisfied to letting someone control what we do. Because it’s never going to be enough for me. I cannot sit still! There has to be something more, I’m never going to be satisfied with that kind of life. I can’t believe that my future husband doesn’t know that. Despite his willingness to fly to see me.
He is the person that I want to be with, and I am willing to give up that much. But I’m now questioning, is he? I have asked so little of him, to this point. And would never ask him for more than he has already given me. Yet, I need him to do more. But, how can you compare, asking to marry me and placing a diamond ring on my figure, to moving 1,5oo miles. Away from a majority of my family and all my friends.
I’m at a loss, and this is not about who’s right or not. I’m just feeling that I don’t know what to accept. Because I did say “yes” to the ring on my figure. And I feel like, I’m doing the best I can to show him that I want to be with him too. I just don’t know how that financial sacrificise complares to emotional one. Can I be happy with him, his family, and his (or our) friends? That is my major concern.