I’m new to this, but I’m not new to love. To give you a little family background, I grew up with parents who rarely, if ever, showed affection. My older brother had a kid, with a girl we never even knew he was dating. They married a year after the kid was born and they have been together for over 10 years now. I can’t say they’re truly happy, but they are sticking it out none the less.

A little more about myself… I’m in a long distance relationship that has been going for a year and a half. I have also been in love with someone else in my past, which hit me on a random Thursday a number of years ago, but I know what I felt. In addition to this, I live with yet another guy friend, it was the best decision after living alone for 8+ years. There has been a lot of life consideration around these and other things.  Please know the guy I live with is not the man that I’m in love with, he’s just a friend.

I have been a avid “journaler” at different times in my life, I find that it releases tension and helps me deal with the feelings that build up inside. Recently, I have been addicted to marriage shows, Married at First Sight, 90 Day Fiance, but I’m not sure I’m going to watch Married by Mom and Dad. But please don’t turn away at this point. The truth is, I want to talk about relationships and love. Not in the same way, I want to know what I feel is real, from both men and women. Love is definitely not a one way street and how do we know which direction to go from here.

Is there a way to define love… I have heard several times what other people think that should, could, or does, feel like. I have heard different people describe what love feels like with their significant other. But does anyone really know love? And although love is my focus, you may find rants among this blog about my feeling misunderstood, under appreciated, or unsure about true love, they are all things that I may write about. But, I promise to you, that I will put my utmost heart and truth into this blog as I can.

Yet, I’m just an average woman, who wants to know what you think love is. How should a relationship look like, how/when do you feel loved, and can someone actually recognize what’s not right, when blinded by emotions? I know that we all face challenges in life. They are not pretty, and they certainly challenge us, but they cause us to want to know and feel love. It’s hard for a lot of people, because they, may not have grown up with it. That doesn’t mean that they have not seen possible mistakes other couple’s make. Or learned from these mistakes, that there’s more to love than what they have seen. And possibly, what I think is now an exception, a good or sometime’s assumed,  perfect relationship, that we get to witness. I know they exists, but how can I be sure that’s what I have.